Practice Perfect 769
Maintaining Patience
Maintaining Patience
I’m sitting here at 11AM on a Tuesday waiting to start a surgery at a local hospital. Because of insurance issues (a common problem in California), I’m forced to do an outpatient surgery at a particular hospital. The procedure was scheduled to start at 11:30AM, but my case has been “bumped” to 1PM. As I sit here, frustrated by the situation, I’m forced to consider the benefits of being patient (a trait I have little in reserve). As a busy and already impatient person, I’m taking this opportunity to teach myself more patience. I hope my exploration of this topic will also help those of you also lacking patience.
Attitude
Let’s start with frame of mind, mindset, or attitude since being patient is really a psychological endeavor. One source described this as “maintaining a steady perseverance1.” I like the sound of that. What a positive way to describe being patient.
Breathing
When that “something” happens, that thing that tries your patience and makes your head feel like it’s going to explode, take a deep breath and keep breathing. Focus on that breathing for a moment.
Do Nothing – Say Nothing
In line with taking a moment to breathe, I have found the best advice in any acutely frustrating situation is to just stay quiet for a few extra moments. In the past, I would react immediately and verbally to something I didn’t like. The positive of this is you know exactly what that person is thinking – it’s honest. On the other hand, we don’t often mean exactly what we say when angry or frustrated. I’ve never regretted what I did not say, while I have many times regretted something said thoughtlessly out of anger. This also gives us time to consider the long-term ramifications of our decisions.
Give Yourself a Break
This is meant figuratively and literally. Remember you’re not perfect, so allow for failure and mistakes without feeding that sense of perfectionism. There’s no need to stack a negative judgement on top of the failure itself. Additionally, during very busy days when a lot is going on, it is helpful to insert breaks between activities whenever possible. That few minutes between responsibilities allows a moment to reset for the next thing.
Practice
If being a patient person is not your forte, then it may require some thoughtfulness and a focused effort to become familiar with your patient side (it’s there, I promise). One suggestion is to consider those things that are triggers and consider how you would deal differently with those annoyances and frustrations. This may also require a discussion with a mentor or loved one who is willing to give honest opinions.
When All Things Fail…Distraction!
After too many late nights waiting to start surgical cases while on call – with foot-tapping impatience, I may add – I finally learned that the one way to deal with my own impatience is through distraction. I learned the hard way to bring work with me and keep myself busy waiting to start that case. It’s amazing how distraction can help the time go by.
I learned the hard way to bring work with me and keep myself busy waiting to start that case. It’s amazing how distraction can help the time go by….plus you get some work done!
You might also be surprised how many of these editorials have been written in the dark of night in a hospital doctors’ lounge!
Unfortunately, there isn’t a prescription or a procedure to maintain that “steady perseverance” to help all of us type A personalities be patient. Until then we’ll just have to work on our psychologies…Lord help us all!
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Hanks H, Stratton P. On learning from the patience. Clin Child Psychol Psychiatry. 2007 Jul;12(3):341-348.
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